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Who else remembers having to watch the news and prime time shows with their parents as a kid when they went on about Lorena Bobitt throwing her husband’s penis out of the car window? Man, I miss the 90s.
Hear me out.
What if we shorted twitter?
When Elon musk originally claimed he would buy twitter, the market price soared until he said he wasn’t going to. Now that he’s announced and bought it again, it once again increased. But now that he’s finally bought it, it’s unlikely it’ll increase further off just him buying it. Most likely the stock would stay rather constant under normal circumstances.
But given the nature of twitter users, these aren’t notmal circumstances. Ever since Elon musk obtained twitter, people have started becoming more bigoted on the site. Racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia is all on the rise on the site currently.
My theory is that there will be a lot of advertisers dropping twitter in the short term future, which means the stock will be sure to go down. It’s on this belief that will make me short twitter $10k. Wish me well monke.
Guys… tax cuts caused inflation, and not 5 trillion the Feds printed.
A spike in Doge tonight just as I predicted
I did not crawl out from under my rock recently so I know that the monetary unit that is not really a vegetable used to be worth 65% more. I guess that other 35% went into the yacht industry???
When im sad i just think about all the poor people dieing in the world right now and it makes me feel ~~better~~ horny 
Looks like it’s sad boi hours. My life has been a series of delusions and poor decisions. Fuck up after fuck up. But for my babies, I must do better.
I am going to give a rare piece of real advice: the time to go all in TLT calls is approaching 
Jack Ma is fine, he’s simply being re-educated
Is it weird to eat fried cheese
Vacationlover doesn’t like me but I like him and that is what is most important
So when does XI just scrap BABA for parts? Surely Jack Ma has been killed by a CCP android in secret by now.
I’ll be honest, I don’t know how much longer I can pretend that I like Hamilton
World is fucked up right now but you kids seem to have a good head on your shoulders and should be fine
Ever sneeze when you’re pushing out a turd?
I like these dudes that have their gf spot them at the gym as if she’s gonna stop the 225 pounds from coming down on his neck if he hurts himself
what’s going on in South Korea?
Why am I hearing talk about a “next pandemic”? That was a once-every-100 years event. Does that stuff actually generate clicks.
One of the worst diseases I’ve ever learned about is osteopetrosis, where someone has a genetic disease at birth that prevents osteoclasts from functioning properly. It basically means your bones do not have cells that can remodel and break down bones properly while you grow. Someone with osteopetrosis literally has solid bones with no hollow areas where marrow should be. The worst part is that nerves travel through many foramens (holes in bones) throughout the body, so if your bones cannot remodel properly, tissues can grow while things like foramens do not, meaning nerves can get compressed/crushed in foramens that will not properly expand with growth. Can you imagine waking up 24/7 365 for the rest of your life with your entire body in excruciating pain because every single bone in your body is squeezing your nerves? Or blind because your brain nerves are being compressed basically everywhere? Horrible, just absolutely awful.
It’s always “wyd” never dywmtcoaeyptycomf
I want to fuck your mother in her pee pee poo poo hoe. She’ll scream, and yell, and holler but I shaint not let her go. Her poo poo drip drip off my pee pee and it makes me whole. The rape man marches on
Sing to the tune of “Glory, Glory, Hallelujah”
It ain’t my fault you guys to understand literary and artistic genius
Fk me I got 50k in my account now and I know I’m gunna yolo it all next week and lose it l, I can’t help myself
Are we looking at NASDAQ +3% on Monday?
ABNB puts gonna print HARD
But somehow it still feels refreshing, even with a sweaty face, knowing that for at least a very brief period of my life, I had expectations, regardless of my massive fuckups and dumb pride. But I won’t go back, I have go on, digging this hole.
Cmon gme
Finger your butthole for Jesus
open the fucking casino. Only thing i can gamble on rn is Dogecoin
Alright fuck it im gonna head over to r/centaurgirls *again…*
Good night kings
ive made myself a mountain of shit to climb from procrastination. i could either give up and fade to nothingness or eat this shit sandwich one bite at a time… fuck.
also, short on 11/4 qqq call vertical spreads.
The world is redistributing it’s wealth as we speak. This is the moment we all have been waiting for. The bus waits for no one!
Quick: how do you get blood out of your cum? And I’m not talking just a drop. Fast!
I’m at work right now 1:12 AM and im on my 4th white claw. LMAO
Verlander has started in World Series games in each of the last three decades…has never won one…and still empties his nutsack into Kate Upton. Respek
What’s a 10x play for next week: I see some asshole dog shit companies going into earnings.
Roku puts for earnings?
Whenever I go walking around somewhere new I also feel the mental images of all those new places coming back at me before sleeping, it’s like being a pale cave dweller makes your brain weak to all the stimulation.
Just nutted to an asian couple in costumes creampie and hitting post nut depression hard AMA 
Srs question…who actually heard this guy say “where’s Nancy?”
How many hours am i supposed to set the clock back to?
Can’t sleep
I can’t believe mark zuckerberg is still trying to make meta work, he’s trying way too early the tech isn’t there yet
Can’t sleep, getting nuked with 2019 and early 2020 memories, back when I had faith. Wouldn’t bother me if I didn’t know that I have a limp dick for hope now, it just dies immediatly.
My guy Zuck is spending 33 million a day on meta. And said spending will increase in 2023. Alrighty then.
Did you know that one of the things that makes you different from virtually all other mammals are the sugar coatings on the surfaces of your cells? Fun fact: there’s a special sugar molecule called ‘alpha-gal’ on non-human tissues and proteins that the human body can detect as foreign. Anyone who gets bit/stuck by the the Lone Star Tick is at risk for developing a hyper acute immune response to alpha-gal. The end result is that people who get stuck by Lone Star Ticks become allergic to meat and can no longer consume it because they become violently ill due to an over active immune response to alpha gal that’s present on meat. This terrible tick can literally make you allergic to meat.