20 Comments

1. 

   AnthonyDante on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   Cashier: Are these for you? *licks lips*

   You: No they are for my Apple stonks

2. 

   rbhutch on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   “He got me invested in some kind of fruit company… then I got a call from them and they said we don’t have to worry about money no more, and I said, that’s good. One less thing.” Forest Gump, king of r/wallstreetbets

3. 

   fuck-fascism on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   I sure hope you asked your wife’s boyfriend to borrow his condoms.

4. 

   Used_Macaron_4005 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   I am curious how many shares is it with all those splits?

5. 

   Aggravating_Ad_3467 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   I got my magnum condoms and a wad of hundreds; I’m ready to plow!

6. 

   deboor71090 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   Frank?

7. 

   Chester-Ming on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   OP you should check the expiry date of those condoms, if you don’t use them for years they stop being effective.

8. 

   evanl714 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   Keep the certificate for nostalgia, but you should attempt to digitize that ASAP. I work at Schwab, I’ve seen these types of certificates end up worthless because they don’t directly convert to present day common stock.

9. 

   Psychological-Dig-29 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

   What kind of idiot only buys 1 share when the price is $0.33?

   Nice investment.. now you can fill up your gas tank once time.

10. 

    St0nkHodler on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    So what’s that worth now, 28 shares?

11. 

    polloponzi on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    How do you get the dividends??

12. 

    Numerous-Afternoon89 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    I mean, i see the apple stock, so it WOULD leave me to believe you are good with money… BUT

    You bought magnum condoms, however i don’t see the rubber bands you will need to use so that the condoms fit correctly.

13. 

    GreatCornolio on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    If you haven’t turned mute on all the comments:

    This is the kind of picture NASA sends into space with like 129 others

14. 

    taffyowner on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    Yeah no shit you’re holding that shit… it would have to literally crater for you to get nothing out of it at this point

15. 

    IfHeDiesHeDiesHeDied on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    Weird flex showing your baggy condoms up here.

16. 

    johnny_mclovin on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    That was nice of your mom’s boyfriend to let you use his condoms for this picture.

17. 

    skunkbollocks on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    > CUSIP 037833100

    How can you hold a stock more than 20 years and still not know what a CUSIP is?

18. 

    Thomas-The-Tutor on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    Doesn’t Trojan have a disclaimer on their packaging to use the appropriate size?

19. 

    NewCommonSensei on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    Til apple was incorporated in 1977

20. 

    mrusse015 on September 29, 2022 at 7:46 am

    lol