What to Say After Your Spouse Passes Away

by | May 29, 2023 | Spousal IRA | 39 comments

What to Say After Your Spouse Passes Away




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In 2020, the federal estate tax basic exclusion amount is $11.58 million. In 2026, the federal estate tax basic exclusion amount sunsets back to about $6 million ($5 million adjusted for inflation).

The estates of people who died in 2020 are not required to file a federal estate tax return if their gross estate is less than $11.58 million. But it may make a great deal of sense for those estate to file the IRS Form 706 – even though they are not required to – in order to make the portability election.

This post is for informational purposes only and does not provide legal advice. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read on this site. Using this site or communicating with Rabalais Estate Planning, LLC, through this site does not form an attorney/client relationship.

Paul Rabalais
Estate Planning Attorney
www.RabalaisEstatePlanning.com…(read more)


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Losing a partner or spouse is one of the most devastating experiences anyone can go through. Despite the inevitable grief and mourning that follow, the world keeps moving, and we’re left to pick up the pieces and try to heal.

During such difficult times, finding the right words to say or actions to take can be a bit of a challenge. You may find yourself struggling to comfort the grieving, trying to make sense of the tragedy that has befallen you.

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However, there’s one word that can provide comfort and help you heal after the loss of a spouse. That word is “love.”

Love is a powerful force that transcends death. Even though your spouse is no longer physically present, the love you shared with them lives on. Remembering and cherishing that love can provide comfort in your time of need.

When you find yourself struggling to cope with your new reality, the word “love” can be a powerful mantra to help you through. It reminds you of the good times and the love you shared, and it can help you find the strength to move forward.

Of course, loving memories alone may not be enough to help you heal. Everyone grieves differently and at their own pace, so it’s important to take the time you need to process your emotions.

Talking openly with friends and family can also be helpful. Sharing your feelings with people who care about you can provide a sense of community and support during an otherwise isolating time.

You may also want to consider seeking professional help. Talking to a therapist or counselor can help you work through your grief and develop a plan for moving forward.

Ultimately, saying “love” after your spouse dies can be a powerful step in your healing process. It acknowledges the enduring strength of the bond you shared and can begin to help you find your way forward.

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39 Comments

  1. Carol Dinius

    Is that word only needed for someone with that much money?

  2. Barbara Fleming

    Awesome Video! Very intriguing to find out what the one word was. Your examples were real-life examples and worth listening to the end. Thanks for all you do to help us understand the laws and how to protect ourselves.

  3. Justine

    My gosh the power of words

  4. Justine

    Wow youve got some rich clients.

  5. Sh Harmon

    Thank you for giving us your time and expertise. I’m sorry some people don’t appreciate your kindness.

  6. EC4400

    Very informative, Thank you. PORTABILITY.

  7. David W

    This is an excellent tip, thank you. Making a note for our attorney.

  8. Jeff Wessel

    I should have found and married Pam

  9. Gloire Ciel

    Thank for the video

  10. Joe Warren

    I now have watched several videos in this series. PORTABILTY is something I was not familiar with, and it could be highly critical … with fluctuations in estate tax law. Thanks for explaining this excellently!

  11. Susan Marie

    OMG….get to the effing point!

  12. WILLIAM HADLEY

    THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR VIDEOS…WOW !!!!!!!!!!

  13. Ms

    A lot of rambling on all of your videos, so about 1 minute or two in, I seek other video channels that are more direct.

  14. Cindy D

    Thank you!!

  15. Robert Wilber

    Leave it to the Dems to increase postdeath govt theft

  16. James Lucas

    Paul, that was a great video. To the audience. Yes this is a long video with a story to get to the main point. But it's worth every moment if you are needing to do an estate plan. If you don't have the discipline to keep focus then you probably don't need to learn this anyways.

  17. Nicci Dee

    TY, good advice

  18. George Zipp

    Good info , but you're a horrible story teller .

  19. francis florez

    Need to get to your point with 65% less words.

  20. M A T

    The one word, “money”. That’s all the family cares about upon the death of a family member.

  21. Vickie Scholl

    Thank you so much for this information. How would a regular lay person ever know this stuff?

  22. Sleeve

    You failed to mention all States do not Honor the Portability exemption between Spouses !
    Illinois for one !
    Another reason so many people have left the,
    " Great State of Confusion " !

  23. Charles Harper

    Wow, my property isn't valued anywhere near what you are talking about, but a 40% tax?!?;?!??
    That is robbery! Stealing!!!

  24. Rumple Stiltskin

    My other half is half owner of a tax accounting business. I will tell him of this "One Word" Many Thanks

  25. goatmonkey2112

    $11 million is also about the same as the gift tax max. If you have that much money, maybe give some of it to the kids before you die.

  26. Pegathee Too

    I always felt that 4 words were better … I didn't do it!

  27. Devil Dog

    any updates for late 2022???

  28. nrich51

    Give the larger portion of your estate to your spouse / kids BEFORE you die.

  29. relentlessmadman

    PORTABLITY<<<<!!!Great Information BUT>>>>!!!!You must be a lawyer because >>>>! You took 16 minutes to convey something that you could have explained in less than 4! Say Billing hours>>!! No say PORTABILIY! or you could have said Portablity in the first place, now I will reasearch it for mineownself! This is the reason why people believe that 500 laywers at the bottom of the ocean, is a good start,, is funny, when in fact as a joke it has a certain ring of truth to it!!!!!!!!!!!! Or may be you are just prone to verboseness??? OR MAY BE IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH AD REVENUE???????????<><><><><><>?

  30. effthegop

    I quit watching after I heard 11.8 million dollar estate LOL.
    Not even fucking close. Maybe 10%
    Now I feel like a failure.
    Thanks? 🙂

  31. Wilma Hend3rson

    My name is Wilma, my husband and only get social security. We own our property and mobile home. We have a motor vehicle that is paid for.
    We have 2 children. Is there anything we need to do to keep the government from taking what little we have?
    There are. No investments of any kind. We do have a small amount in the bank, less than one hundred dollars.

  32. Nomadia Van

    I can only hope to have this problem.

  33. Gw KGB

    Just set up a trust that simple cheep as a will but never deal with probate trust don’t die

  34. tony romo

    Bullet points on portability at the beginning of the video would be more helpful. Then if the viewer needs more they can listen to the examples and details. Otherwise it sounds like click bait.

  35. David Amburgey

    Sometimes it`s good to be poor No worries I`m just POOR

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